Mmmmm....Brownies!!!!

Back to the drawing board. Doctors, Radiation Oncologists, Technicians, etc. I met with the Radiation Oncologist who is going to be looking after radiating my brain. We went through the whole process and potential side effects, some worth mentioning.

It's another 25 treatments. 5 days a week for 5 weeks. Each treatment will be approximately 45 minutes, but the actual radiation will be between 10 - 15 minutes. This time the mapping process is a bit different. I will have to be fitted for a mask and helmet and mouth guard...what am I - a goalie????

I have been for many MRI's (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) and I am not claustrophobic. However, the mask thing freaks me out. It is to keep my head still during treatment and will be lined up and marked so the same areas get radiated. This sure beats having to have my head bolted down to the table with screws.

The Doctors noticed the tension in my face and body when they mentioned the mask and asked me if I was okay with it. When I said that it made me uncomfortable to actually have something covering my face during treatment, they said they had something to relax me. Since my sleeping pills haven't been working for me lately (I actually stopped using them after I was told to double up on them), I have found other recreational relaxants. I disclosed this little bit of what I thought was important information and was told "off the record" that instead of smoking anything "harmful", I might want to make "special brownies". Imagine my shock when this resident Doctor proceeded to run off the "recipe". My dear husband and I had a good laugh and realized that someone in this meeting sure had a lot of experience with these "brownies". One never knows what one will hear on any given appointment.

Being tired and/or exhausted from these treatments is a given. What surprised me was finding out how long this particular effect might last. Instead of taking a month or so to recover and start feeling good, this could last months....MONTHS!!!!! *#&%!!!!!!

I will be commencing the said radiation treatments on March 25th. I knew that this day would come and I thought I was prepared for it, but now that I have these appointments in writing, I find that I am nervous and apprehensive. Another hit of reality. I've been feeling quite good lately, with an abundance of energy (for the most part) and now, just around the corner, is another let down. I can hardly wait.....not.

Here's the bright side....it's almost over. I will enjoy some exotic travel with my husband (a well deserved holiday) and a wonderful summer with my wonderful kids...finally!